


Fan Letters

by NeverBeenAWriter



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:06:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23625844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeverBeenAWriter/pseuds/NeverBeenAWriter
Summary: While bored in quarantine Phil (with the help of Dan) decides to go through some fan letters from a decade ago. Finding a piece of history he didn't know he'd ever lost.
Relationships: Dan Howell & Phil Lester, Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 6
Kudos: 70





	Fan Letters

With quarantine in place and nothing to do, Phil decided it would be a perfect time to start cleaning out his home office. It wasn't dirty or obviously messy but inside every drawer was random papers and dried up pens. There was also a closet that contained boxes of old letters and gifts sent from fans that he moved with him from place to place but never properly went through. He supposed it was time to take them all to the storage unit but with lock down in place now wasn't the time for that, so maybe it was time to go through them. "What are you doing?" Dan asked from the doorway, startling Phil as he stared at the boxes, overwhelmed by the thought of going through to many letters. 

"Procrastinating," Phil replied with a chuckle. "I was going to clean out the office, but I forgot how much stuff was in here and now I'm a bit overwhelmed." Phil looked to Dan and seen him leaning against the door frame and smiled, he was thankful to be in quarantine with the love of his life. 

Dan pushed off the door frame and approached him, taking a seat beside the stack of boxes. "Fine, I'll help."

"You don't have to Dan, it's my mess," Phil replied, despite actually wanting Dan's help.

"I know, but I'm a kind soul who can't just go play a game while I know you're in here stressing yourself out," Dan said, looking up at Phil. He tapped the ground beside him. "Let's start, one box at a time, no one says we have to do them all today. It's not like we have any plans for tomorrow, or any time this week." Dan chuckled but it was a bit forced. Phil knew the lock down was causing him some anxiety but he'd been doing good at handling it. Keeping himself busy, Phil assumed maybe that's what this was too, a way to keep himself busy.

"Okay." Phil sat down beside Dan on the floor and flipped open the lid of the plastic moving box. "You sure you're ready for this?" He asked as they seen the box was packed full of letters. 

Dan grinned, rolling up his sleeves and reaching into the box to pull out a smaller stack to go through. Dan noticed they had all been opened, meaning when Phil received them he had actually read every one, he smiled to himself, Phil had always been such a sweet and caring person. "Okay, how are we sorting these?"

"By year I guess?" Phil answered. 

Dan nodded and started carefully opening one the letters and reading aloud. "Dear AmazingPhil, I really enjoy your vids, especially the ones with the lion. I'm sorry about Simon tho, he was a good little fish. That Dan guy is funny too. I seen the Philisnotonfire video yesterday, it was the most fun I ever had!" Dan read with a smile on his face. "That 'Dan guy'" he repeated with a laugh. "Kinda love how I went from 'just that other guy' to us basically being considered one person."

Phil laughed and smiled taking the letter and starting a stack for the 2009 letters. "You were never 'just that other guy' people just didn't know you as well then," Phil replied. "Don't sell yourself short, people loved you once they started to know you." Dan nodded and smiled. 

Phil took a turn reading one aloud. “Dear AmazingPhil, I love your videos and the randomness you put in them. Your unique look on things makes you very interesting. That Dan guy I’m not quite a big fan of but, you do you! Anyway, love your videos and hope to see many more. P.S. I think the lion you have is cute - Jen” Phil pouted at the mention of someone not liking Dan.

Dan on the other hand, laughed aloud. “You and me both, Jen,” he responded with a chuckle. “I wish someone had told me sooner that the ‘edgy’ persona I put on wasn’t actually cool,” he added, rolling his eyes at himself. “I wonder if their opinion of me has changed.”

“I’m sure it has,” Phil replied with a wide grin. “What’s not to love,” he added, leaning over to peak Dan on the lips. Dan smiled and reached for another letter.

They spent a good hour going back and forth and reading letters, laughing at old jokes and smiling at cute drawings, also occasionally getting emotional over heartfelt stories. Hearing people’s stories of how they were inspired to start a channel, or work toward their dreams. No matter how many times they heard those things it never stopped being overwhelming.

Phil took another one, opening it carefully as to not rip the slightly aged paper. "Hey," he said holding it up excitedly. "This one's from another Dan."

Dan laughed. "It's not an uncommon name you know," he responded, pulling out some of the fanart and looking at it as Phil read aloud.

"Hey, Phil, my name is Dan, you don't know me yet, but I hope someday you will. I have been watching your videos from the beginning of your youtube journey and I look up to you a lot. You make awesome content that never fails to make me laugh or smile. My home life hasn't always been the best and friends are kind of non-existent for me right now-" Dan reached over and grabbed the letter roughly. "Dan! You could have ripped it!" Phil said, annoyed at Dan's lack of regard for something so personal to someone.

Dan remained quiet, looking down at the letter in his hand. Phil looked at him, his anger softening. "What's wrong?" Phil asked, reaching over to touch Dan's cheek. "That one hit too close to home?" He knew Dan could be triggered sometimes by certain things though normally not something like this.

Dan stayed quiet but Phil could see his cheeks heating up. "I think I wrote this,” he said quietly, lifting his eyes to look at Phil. His embarrassment was clear across his face.

“What?” Phil gawked, his eyes open wide. “Really?” he questioned, thinking maybe Dan was playing a prank. Dan nodded, looking over the letter, his eyes scanning the paper as he read the words silently. Phil’s face lit up and leaned forward kissing Dan’s cheek. “That’s so cute!” he said warmly. “I can’t believe you wrote me letter.”

“I completely forgot I ever sent you one,” Dan said, staring at it in disbelief. “It’s definitely me though, I remember it now that I’m holding it.” 

“This was before we talked?” Phil asked, truly curious of the contents of the letter but not wanting to push Dan to show him.

“Yeah, I reached out by letter first because I was too nervous to contact you in a way you might actually respond to,” Dan replied with a chuckle. “Here,” he said, passing it back to Phil. “I know you want to read the rest, just do it later, when I’m not around. Okay?” 

“Are you sure?” Phil questioned, not reaching for the folded up letter. “It’s okay if you want to pretend we never found it and move on.” Phil reassured.

“Nah, it was meant for you, it’s yours.” Dan put it in Phil’s hands and smiled. “Plus it’s not like it’s new information, you already know I was kind of obsessed with you,” he added with a chuckle. 

Phil smiled and nodded, putting the paper in his pocket for later. “Wanna go through a few more before dinner?” 

“Sure,” Dan replied, reaching for another small stack.

-

After spending another half hour sorting letters, they made dinner together and ate on the sofa while playing Animal Crossing. Phil enjoyed every moment with Dan, especially quiet domestic ones like this, but he was only half able to pay attention; the letter in his pocket in the back of his mind the whole evening. He felt a sense of relief when Dan stood up and announced he was going to take a shower. 

Phil watched as he left the room and then waited until he heard the water before furiously grabbing the paper from his pocket, begin careful not to rip it. “"Hey, Phil, my name is Dan, you don't know me yet, but I hope someday you will. I have been watching your videos from the beginning of your youtube journey and I look up to you a lot. You make awesome content that never fails to make me laugh or smile. My home life hasn't always been the best and friends are kind of non-existent for me right now but watching your videos makes me feel like I have a friend. I hope that someday I can inspire people and make some emo kid a bit happier like you do for me. It’s currently a pipe dream, but maybe someday I can be a youtuber as well and we can collab? Heh, a kid can dream. 

P.s. You’re really hot.”

Phil laughed out loud and smiled, he no longer had any doubts that this letter was from his Dan, even years ago Dan just had a certain way about him. The letter pulled at his heart strings, bringing back old memories and the forgotten feeling of what it had been like to be so far apart. The familiar overwhelming feeling of love he had for Dan hit him, this kind, gentle, loving, boy had reached out so many years ago and now he got to spend his life with him. It felt like fiction but he knew it wasn’t. He would have never believed that anyone could love him as much as Dan always had, but he believed it once he met Dan and realized how strong love could be. 

Phil got up and headed into their bedroom to find a safe place to keep this important piece of their history. He decided to put it inside his journal for now until he got a keep sake box. He sat down on the bed and fidgeted with the blanket, hoping Dan would be done with the shower soon, suddenly they felt so far apart and Phil just wanted to hold him. After a minute of waiting he got up and went to the bathroom door, knocking gently.

“You can come in,” Dan called through the door. Phil opened it slowly and stepped inside, closing it behind him to keep the heat in. “So? You read it yeah?” Dan said, looking at him through the fogged glass shower door. Phil watched as the water ran over his skin, mesmerized. “Earth to Phil,” Dan said with a laugh getting his attention.

“Oh sorry,” Phil murmured. “Yeah I read it,” he answered, leaning against the sink and just watching Dan. After 10 years it wasn’t that weird to watch each other shower. 

“Would you have responded to me on twitter if you knew I was that same Dan?” Dan asked with a chuckle. “I was so cringey, holy fuck.”

“Our love story is kinda crazy isn’t it?” Phil asked, choosing not to answer Dan’s question. Phil didn’t like to think about how things could have gone differently, there were so many variables that lead to them being together and the thought that it so easily could have gone a different way made him anxious.

Dan hummed in agreement. “Like fiction,” he agreed, lathering his hair with the woodsy scented shampoo he liked.

“Or fate,” Phil added in, knowing that as much as Dan claimed he didn’t believe in fate or soulmates he was the one who first called them that. 

Dan gave him a soft smile through the glass. “You gonna join me in here, or just watch all night?” Phil chuckled and took off his clothes before opening the shower door. Dan quickly pulled him inside and shut it behind him, he pulled Phil close and kissed him softly. “I love you,” he said quietly.

“I love you too,” Phil replied. “Every version of you,” he added. “Even the kinda cringey version of you that sent me a letter ending in ‘P.s. you’re hot.’” Phil laughed and Dan rolled his eyes.

“Can’t blame me for being honest. And I believe ‘really hot’ were my exact words,” Dan responded, playing with Phil’s hair, made longer by the water weighing it down. Phil snorted, but leaned closer holding Dan’s face in his hands. 

“If only I’d know back then how insanely sexy and beautiful the boy named Dan really was,” he mused, leaning in to kiss the beauty in front of him.

“Yeah, I should have included a nude, that would have made me memorable,” Dan said as their lips parted.

Phil laughed, “Oh god, I’m so glad you didn’t do that… you would have gone down in history as one of those weirdos like the girl who licked my face,” Phil cringed at the memory.

“Oh god, I forgot about that. Wonder what she’s up to now?” Dan wondered aloud.

“Hopefully she’s living her best life, and not licking people… Or maybe she found someone else who’s into that.” Phil responded gesturing to behind Dan where his shampoo was. Dan passed Phil his sweet shampoo and held out his hands. “Let me wash your hair?” Phil smiled and nodded, pouring the pretty blue shampoo into Dan’s open hands. He closed his eyes and basked in the comfortable silence as Dan pampered him. 

“I’m so thankful that you didn’t give up on trying to reach me,” Phil said after a moment. “I can’t picture a life without you.”

“You’ll never have too,” Dan assured, giving him a soft kiss. “I’ll never give up on trying to reach you.”

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by a tweet I seen months ago and it just took me awhile to write it ^^; Also the fan letters were taken from some of my twitter followers (Thank you!!) and yes Jen does love Dan now for anyone wondering haha.
> 
> Thanks for reading, I feel really rusty at this so please be kind, but critiques always welcome <3 
> 
> I hope everyone is safe and healthy and if you have any fic ideas please let me know either in the comments or on twitter (NeverBeenAWriter is my fic account but is also 18+ so you can find me at NoelKagamine if you are younger ^^)


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